Under the Hood

My silver Nissan had two doors and pop-up headlights. As I sped down the summer back roads I thought about the story I'd heard at camp in which a woman fucked herself on the stick shift of her boyfriend's car. I eyed the gear shift curiously. I shifted into fifth and hugged the curves while blowing my speakers and screaming along.

Of the summer before my junior year I remember driving most. I remember determinedly smoking stolen cigarettes, cruising around aimlessly, and panting for sex. By the time I was 16 I'd been busy pushing hairbrush handles, empty beer bottles, and my determined fingers inside of myself for at least a year. The first time my burgeoning boyfriend got me alone he laid on top of me as we kissed. I played coy to hide my fear and pushed my hands into his pockets to slow him down. The square condom wrapper in his pocket caught me off guard, "I'm not going to have sex here! My cousin's just down the hall!"

Sheepishly he said he'd only brought it "in case". I smirked and enjoyed his hard-on against my leg and kissed him a minute longer. I walked down the hall toward the group of teenagers and television feeling red and disheveled. I wasn't used to this type of explicit behavior with boys.

Soon after the beginning of the school year, we spent an hour or two, as the blue sky darkened, leaning against each other and smoking rebel cigarettes on his front stoop. My cotton underpants were so sticky as I shyly looked at him that I was certain he could see my arousal.

My school-night-curfew approaching I turned to him and saw the lights of the baseball field nearby reflecting in his dark eyes. His hands went to my waist when he leaned in and quickly roamed to my hips, then sides, then low back. My "nice girl" persona still intact and nervous, I kept my hands above his waist; on the back of his neck and in his hair. He whispered to me about "doing it" and "did I want to?" When I asked "where" he nodded toward his back yard, "Out here. No one will come out and it's dark enough." In the first of many "checkmates" from my cunt I agreed.

My reluctance to lie down in the dirt for My First Time led us to his older brother's car, which was locked. I heard the hood give beneath me as I eased my back onto it while being groped and kissing. His hands left my body to reach into his pocket. I felt my First embarrassing intercourse moment as I waited for him to get the condom on. The more embarrassing reality of sex sped into images stolen from Skinemax and lewd chat rooms.