Top 5 Reasons Why (plus 4 others)

[Y]ou need to learn to be honest with yourself. Figure out what you will and will not do, and what is a "maybe". Search inside yourself for what you really want, and when you find it, be honest to anyone you talk to. Don't agree to something long-term that you know you will not be able accomplish. Ask yourself some hard questions. The rest of this article will give you aspects to contemplate so you can base your decisions on reality, and not someone else's dreams of how it should be. - from "So You Want to Be a Slave: The Realities"

I read paragraphs similar to above beginning in the late spring of 2007. It was all about sex to me then. My thinking was bound by three columns of sex acts labeled yes, no, and maybe. (Or, in the BDSM world, please, peanut butter, and maybe.) I made arbitrary decisions about piss, spit, and humiliation. Arbitrary, because I was a topless bottom. A master-less slave. As the first man who wanted to master me put it, I was wanton.

My master, aka my man, gave me the article quoted above last week and asked for my thoughts on it. I was so excited by my reactions, our discussions, and my constant excitement to write that this blog was more seriously formed. I have 3 major steps of reaction to the ideas in this article and I'm going to write about them now. I'll wait here while you take a few minutes to process that article.


The first thing I trip over in that article is the neo-cultural imposition in the grammar. I am opposed to the following grammar: "my Master said He wanted me to come in." I am not going to take time out of my creative process to remember to capitalize male pronouns in the middle of a sentence for my man's honor. He doesn't care if I do or don't and so, I reject the importance that has been placed on this tradition. I understand it, I just don't care for it and boy, does it feel good to say so!

I will use the common BDSM abbreviation "D/s" (Dominant/submissive) because it is understood by sexual "deviants" everywhere. Greetings fellow deviants!

These varied reactions this article spurred create a tension which I find interesting, and if you make it to the end of this entry, then I guess you find it interesting too. If you have reactions yourself, please do share them. I'd love to hear ALL viewpoints.

Reactions/Counter-reactions to "So You Want to be a Slave"

1A. I don't want my opinions, desires, and tastes, to always be moot!!
1B. A situation in which my opinions, desires, and tastes were unaccounted for would make me unhappy. My man doesn't want me to be unhappy.

2A. I don't want my entire existence to be predicated on making him happy!! I feel that existing solely to entertain and please another may imply that my own pleasure is worth less. I am not worth less!
2B. My man wants me to be happy and to achieve my dreams. If he tells me to do, or not do, something, it is because he is thinking of my higher aims.  He loves me and is helping me reach my goals.

As I mentioned before, I used to think that D/s relationships were ALL about sex when I began my exploration of them. All I knew was that my panties, if they were still on, got real wet when someone talked dirty to me, spanked me, got rough with me, and that I wanted MORE.

Now, when my man talks about the fact that my cunt, ass, mouth and everything in between belong to him, are his, I get even wetter. It still is not "just sex." There are understandings between us that make this language and these ownership triggers happy and freeing. I'm getting very excited thinking about all this so I'm going to make another list:

Why I Am a Mastered Slave
1. It is my karma to reunite the male and female energy
2. I have some areas where stronger discipline is needed
3. I want help
4. I want to help
5. I crave kinky sex

For summary's sake I want to also recap the points above that have been presented (and in some cases not yet discussed).
1. I'm not going to capitalize Master etc. just because it's traditional. (see paragraph 4)
2. My D/s relationship is only partially about sex.
3. My man wants me to be happy.
4. My man is helping me reach my goals.

I hope you're excited to read and comment more about these points because I'm excited to write about them! Only, I'm going to do it later. I'm tuckered for now.